Forever Midnight
by Tash Salvatore
Summary: When Edward left Bella in New Moon, what did he do? With this fan fic, hopefully, questions will be answered :-
1. Part one

Chapter one

Edward

I walked into Carlise and Esme's new home with reluctance. I didn't want to be here but I had to check in once a month or Esme would probably die with the worry. The new house was just outside of Los Angles but it wasn't like our old house. It had small windows and antique decorating. Flower arrangements everywhere and Persian rugs. I walked into the living room and saw Alice sitting on the sofa. Alice then looked straight at me and smiled.

"Edward!" She said with joy and the next thing I knew, Alice was hugging me with her python like arms.

"I'm just checking in, Alice," I told her but she kept hugging me as if she was never going to let me go.

"I know but I missed you," Alice stopped hugging me and looked at me with sad eyes. "It's hard living with Rosalie and Emmet. They hog the bathroom."

_If I keep him talking long enough then Carlise might have time to convince him to stay, _Alice thought.

"Alice, I'm not staying. I just want to check in with Esme," I told her and her eyes looked as if her dreams had been shattered.

"Please Edward. Just stay here. If you miss Bella that much then maybe we could go back to Forks," Alice suggested but I knew that could never happen.

I moved away from Forks for Bella's safety. I can't go back. I can't.

"Where's Esme?" I asked before Alice stalled me anymore.

"She's in the library," Alice said sulkily.

"Thanks," I told her and walked around her to get to the stairs.

I walked up the big, old staircase holding onto the banister. All the way up the stairs I knew Alice was watching and that made me feel worse.

_How can he just leave us? It's one thing to leave Bella but to leave his family! We have been together for years and it takes one thing to ruin it all. I wish he would do something. Anything! All he does is brood. He can't brood for all of eternity. At least I hope so, _Alice thought.

I reached the top of the staircase and went down the hallway and into the library. Esme was reading in a big leather armchair. She was reading _Romeo and Juliet._ I never did really like that book. The humans were idiots and in the end it wasn't their family that separated them. It was their own idiocy.

"Hello Esme," I said as I walked over to the armchair she was sitting in.

"Edward!" Esme exclaimed and hugged me.

Esme wasn't as tight as Alice's hug but the love was still there.

_My darling Edward is back. It may only be a short visit but who cares, _Esme thought and squeezed me tighter. _Please don't leave again. Please don't._ I heard Esme cry inside and it was heart breaking.

I loved Esme as if she was my own mother but hearing her cry inside made me gently push her off of me. Esme looked hurt. I tried to stop listening to her thoughts but when I did the sound of her silent cry haunted me.

"I should go," I told her and walked out of the library.

Esme just stayed standing where I left her. I walked down the big staircase again to see Alice standing at the bottom. I stopped a few steps away from the bottom and had a staring match with Alice.

"You caused this," Alice said.

"I know."

"It may be to protect Bella but hurting your family-especially Esme-is wrong. I hope you know that."

"You're sounding more like Rosalie every visit," I told her slyly jumped over Alice so I could leave the house.

_I know you're reading my thoughts so you can go..._I stopped listening to Alice's thoughts because I knew what she was going to say.

It wasn't like Alice to be so…so…I can't describe how Alice was acting. I knew she was only doing it because she loved me and missed me. At least I hope. 


	2. part two

Chapter two

Edward

I walked through the streets of Los Angeles alone. It was a cold winters night but that didn't stop me wearing a shot sleeve t-shit. The streets were almost deserted apart from a few prostitutes hanging about outside of strip clubs. I had chosen a bad part of Los Angles for a midnight stroll. I wanted to get out of this town. Out of this state. Out of this God for saken country. But I couldn't. Esme would know because Alice would have told her and I didn't want Esme to cry inside. The thought of Esme's crying on the inside sent a wave of guilt through my body.

_I can't believe I'm going to do this, _I heard Alice think.

Suddenly Alice's hand was on my arm. I tried to shake her off but Alice was stronger than she looks.

"Edward, please come back with me and talk to everyone," Alice said and her big sad eyes almost made me burst with guilt.

"Ok, but I will leave tomorrow night," I told her and she started to drag me back in the direction I came.

"Don't worry we won't take you away from your brooding for too long," Alice said almost cheerfully.

"Hello brother," Rosalie said with resentment.

I walked onto the living room for the second time today but now it had all of family in it. W didn't say a word but Rosalie's words were a big enough conversation for me. The all stared at me but when I looked at them individually they averted their gaze. I didn't read their minds because I really didn't want to know what they thought of me.

"Edward, we want to ask you something," Esme said breaking the long silence.

"What is it?" I asked wanting to read her mind but I knew I would hear the crying sound.

"Son, we want to know what you're doing when you're not visiting us," Carlise said.

I didn't want to answer that question because honestly I just walked and wondered if I should go back to Forks.

"We're all worried about you and we think it would be best if we all go back to Forks," Esme said.

"If this is what you brought me back here to do then I'm leaving," I headed for the front door quickly.

I was faster than Alice so I managed to get out of the door before she could even take the first stride.


	3. Part three

Chapter Three

Edward

I had to see Bella, even if she didn't see me. I sat in my car with the key in the ignition. I wanted to drive but I just sat there. Maybe I should get a different car. Or maybe I shouldn't go at all. No, I should go and check up on her. I will keep my promise because she won't see me. I revved up my car and headed to Forks. It was a stupid idea but I had nothing else to do.

It was December second when I arrived in Forks and the town was almost deserted. The again, who's up at midnight? I drove all the way Bella's house in about ten minutes. Her house looked lifeless but I knew Bella was in her room even though I couldn't read her mind. I parked outside of her house unnoticed. I got out of my car and went around the house so I could get to Bella's window. I used the tree outside of her window to climb to her window ledge. Her window was slightly open so I crawled in, instantly smelling Bella's scent. She smelt so nice and she looked so peaceful when she was sleeping. I went into the shadowed corner of her room, which was far away from her bed but close enough so I could see her. Bella's hair was longer than I remembered it but it still looked nice. She seemed skinnier and that worried me. Was she eating properly? I guessed that she was slightly taller now but I couldn't tell because she was lying down. Suddenly Bella's hand moved to her chest and she started to scream. Her scream was the worst sound I'd ever heard. Bella screamed for about five minutes and those five minutes were the longest minutes of my life. Charlie then came into the room and sat on Bella's bed. He put his hands on her arms and tried to calm her down.

"Calm down Bella," He told her. "He's not coming back. You have to accept that."

Bella opened her eyes and they were bloodshot. She wasn't screaming anymore but the look on her face was just as bad.

"But I loved him dad. How could he leave me?" Bella asked and Charlie hugged her tightly.

"I don't know baby. I just don't know," Charlie said and let Bella cry on his shoulder.

This was my fault but she would get over me, right? She has to because she needs a human life and her human life doesn't involve me. I loved Bella but if you love something you should let it go. Or was I just talking a load of crap? No, I have to let Bella go because if I don't she will beg to become a vampire and Bella can be very persuasive. It was for the best. It was for the best.

_You keep telling yourself that, big guy._

Charlie left Bella's room and hour later, which didn't bother me, but I needed to get out of here. It took Bella five minutes to fall asleep. When I was sure Charlie was asleep as well I started to climb out of Bella's room. I jumped onto the tree outside of Bella's room and then leaped to the ground. My one mistake was hitting the flowerpot. I could tell it woke Bella up because I heard her say, "Edward? Edward!". I quickly ran to my car and became glad that I left the key in the ignition. I turned key and drove away silently. As if I was never there.


	4. part four

Chapter Four

Edward

I missed Bella. I missed my family. Hell, I even missed Forks! It was sad, but true. I couldn't make a move without Alice knowing my move before me. I could read minds but so we both had an advantage, which made us equals. Although, when I wasn't paying attention, Alice would ambush me and try and convince me to go home. How could I go home? Bella was there and I promised her that she would never see me again. Charlie was there and I'm sure he's like to show me his left hook. No, I can't go back. No matter how much Alice nagged me.

"You can't run forever," Alice told me.

"Well Bella won't be around for ever, will she?"

"Edward, you know what I mean and you can't live without Bella."

"Yes I can!"

"Have you looked in the mirror lately? Your shirt looks dirty, your jeans look a shade darker than I remember them and have you seen your hair?!"

"I don't have any other cloths."

"Or is it because you can't be bothered?" Alice walked towards me and put her index finger on my chest. "Edward, please don't do this to yourself. It's like watching a grown man killing a puppet off of a kids TV show."

"One, you have really weird analogy's. Two, I can't go back to Forks."

"Why not?!"

"I promised Bella that I would never see her again."

Alice just stared at me with a shocked expression. _What an idiot! _Alice thought.

"That girl lives for you. She wants you to go back! She _needs _you to go back!" Alice shouted and started making strong hand gestures.

"It's safer if I stay away from her!"

"You haven't seen what I've seen! She if a lifeless shell! She thinks that you don't love her!"

"Maybe it's better that way…"

"Oh my God! You really are a heartless basterd! You can't even care about Bella for one second!"

"I do care about her! She's just safer without me…"

Alice took a deep breath. She gave me a stare that could only mean one thing. Alice still loved me.

"Edward, you're my brother so I will always love you but I can't watch you hurt yourself like this. Bye, Edward," Alice said and hugged me gently.

"Bye, Alice," I told her and hugged her slightly.

Alice left my apartment and I knew she left her hope for me here. I didn't blame her. I had lost hope for myself so why should anyone else have hope?

Alice hasn't ambushed me since then but I knew she had considered it. I missed Alice, almost as much as Bella.

Bella…

I then realized something. Bella was the only thing that was keeping me alive. I didn't have to talk, see or here her. Just knowing that she was alive was enough for me. I couldn't live in a world where Bella wasn't alive. I just couldn't.


	5. Part five

**Sorry its taken me so long to update and my apologise if this chapter is crappy and short =( so....enjoy =)**

Chapter Five

Edward

Bella. Dead.

The two words aren't meant to be in the same sentence. But Rosalie just said them together. Bella couldn't be dead. I stayed away so that she wouldn't end up dead.

"Edward, don't do anything stupid," Rosalie told me but how could I not?!

Bella was dead. She was my only reason to stay alive. But now she's gone. I have nothing now. I have a family that accepts me but I don't want to be accepted. I just want to see Bella again. If only for a minute. Even a second. But I would never see her again. She was probably in heaven by now but I can't live without her being alive. I need her to be alive. If she's dead then maybe I should be dead to. I mean, properly dead. Not vampire dead.

"Are you even listening to me?" Rosalie asked sounding annoyed.

"Actually, I'm not. I don't need to listen to some dumb blonde saying it will be all right cause it won't! Bella's dead and now I have nothing!" I shouted and walked away from Rosalie.

Rosalie grabbed my arm and stopped me walking for a few seconds. But in those few seconds she said my ticket to death. The Volturi.

"Thanks for the idea, _sis,_" I said and walked out the front door of my family's new house.

As soon as I stepped onto the porch, I broke into a sprint because Rosalie was smart enough to realize what I was planning. She was a clever blonde.

"EDWARD! DON'T DO IT!" Rosalie shouted but I didn't listen.

I was to busy mourning to realize anything other than my own thoughts.


End file.
